Thursday, January 31, 2008

My "BLONDE" Moment

Ok so I'm not a real blonde but I am DEFINITLY true to the sterotype and have my moments! The video below may just challenge Jessica Simpsons "Chicken of The Sea" moment.
Long story short, Rapper Consequence recently shot his video for "Feel This Way" off of his critically acclaimed "Don't Quit Your Day Job" album. I was lucky enough to be part of the team and throw my extra special "Jen The Pen" touch on the coordination of the video. Quence decided it would be fun to film all adventures leading up to the day of filming. And of course the most special moment was our dinner to India on the Hudson. This was my introduction to Indian food. (Sidebar: I must really trust dude, others have tried but have failed) So the entire time driving to Hoboken, Cons kept talking about something called "Naan Bread"
Mind you, in my head I'm like "WHAT THE FUCK is Non Bread?" But I didn't wanna ask and sound stupid. So I just rode it out, hoping I would figure it out.
Well we get to the restaraunt and Cons starts ordering... so me not knowing what anything is gonna taste like, I tell him to just order for me. Ok so you all remember Along Came Polly right? Well all i could do was pray I wasn't gonna have a Ben Stiller episode when he was in the Indian spot. This was only like my second date. There were no time for bathroom attacks.
So fast forward to the serving of the appetizer, the Naan Bread comes out and below is "My Blonde Moment"
Shout out to my favorite rapper Consequence for showcasing my moment!!!
Make sure to check out his blog
He's also got something special to add to my blog starting next week! Make sure to check back!

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Coming to a venue near you!

Kanye has announced that his Glow Tour will make it's way to the U.S.
This is a show not to miss!!!!
G.O.O.D. thing me and Cons are such great friends (Wink Wink)

The stork is landing

A very pregnant J Lo is getting ready to pop those babies out today!!! I'm super excited for her! Hope they take her good looks!

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

The crazy reasons why women have sex

The following are strange but true reasons why women have sex. No surprise, attraction holds the top slot but here's a few wacky reasons as well.

1. To make going to the gym obsolete.

2. To prove to ourselves we are OVER our ex

3. Reading that doggie style can either tighten your butt or make it bigger

4. To sleep better afterwards

5. To bring our periods on

My next challenge

If you know and love me, you should know that when I started out in this game at the tender age of 18, my dream job was to be the "Lizzie Grubman of Personal Assisiting". I would do everything from assiting the local staten island rapper, to walking around Manahattan visiting every mixtape store there was and leaving my business cards. All in hopes to become Dj Clue's assistant and work my way up to becoming Puff's assistant. Strange but true. In my daily ventures I came across Kay Slays right hand man and ended up being offered a job with them. Mind you I was 18, driving a beat up Cavalier and using all the money I had to get back and forth to the city everyday just to go to this job and make a lousy $200 dollars a week. But I said fuck it, it's better then being an intern and not getting paid at all.
That position eventually took a turn for the worst and I was back working odd end jobs and searching the internet everyday for the next chance at becoming someones "Assistant" I eventually interned for Wendy Williams made tons of contacts, went on tons of job interviews with artists, managers and everything in between... when The Ultimate Hustler came to furition.
This was it! My time to shine! And noone could tell me anything different! The chance to be on a reality show with Dame Dash! One of the top moguls of our time and be able to showcase my abilities to be the best assistant one could be. I had waited for this chance and I wasn't going to miss this once in a lifetime opportunity. Fast forward. Through long interview cycles I was picked! I was going to be a contestant on The Ultimate Hustler! Hence where I got my name "Jen The Pen" Dame Dash said I literally wrote everything down and I would one day be a great assistant to someone. He thought I was crazy for not setting my goals higher...but I had a plan...and my plan hasn't turned out so bad. I'm the assistant to one of the top songwriters in the music buisness, and have used my reality show celebrity to become "Jen The Pen" a witty, charming radio personality. One would think I should be soo proud of myself and content....but at last I'm always looking for a challenge.
And so I think I might have found my next big challenge in life

Wish me luck everyone!!!!

Britney before Kevin and motherhood

I came across this video and felt the need to share it with you all....with all the Britney madness, I decided to shy away from it for a moment and rememeber the good old days before Kevin, motherhood and a strange British personality took over our favorite pop star.

A moment of slience please....

Mixtapes aren't dead!

Just when they said mixtapes were dead my dear friend Dj Radio is bringing the meaning of a true mixtape back!

Peep the cover of his latest mixtape. I think it's kinda dope!

Also a big Happy 25th Birthday to him as well! xoxo

Monday, January 28, 2008

SoOooOOo In Loveeeeeeeee

Since I just took two shots at Common and you all may be thinking I'm a bit cruel... Let's gush for a minute over how in love Brad and Angelina still are. Rumors have it that Angelina is expecting twins!!!

When good looking couples made sense

Look who's dating again

So I know I may upset some people with what I'm about to say but please blame my mind not my heart...

WHAT THE FUCK iS THAT????? And where did Kerry Washington go?!!!!!!!!!! I do not care how much bread one woman may have or how many tennis championships she may have won....any man who owns up to dating that must like men. I'm appalled

Sunday, January 27, 2008

I wish I had a headline

You can find this teeshirt on

It's Almost Time People!!

White Girl Tip of the Week

I learned this weekend that rather then speaking out of frustation, to speak straight from the heart. It's exactly what you may need to rest your mind and exactly what he/she needs to hear <33

xoxo Jen The Pen

What a cocksucker!!!!

Apparently Britney Spear’s paparazzo on-and-off again boyfriend Adnan Ghalib is far from done milking his meal tickets. After selling his story to Entertainment Tonight and The Insider last week, Adnan is now trying to sell six video diaries of the mentally unstable star.
And now he’s asking $2 million for the YouTube-style clips!

Again I ask when is someone going to step in...this is sad and pathetic and even more disgusting are the networks that are paying for the footage and voicemails.I really just want to hug poor Britney.

A source for News Of The World got a preview of the clips, and here’s their breakdown:

CLIP 1 shows Britney sitting on her bed wearing a nightie. She talks about herself in the third person and rambles about her childhood. She’s heard saying:

“When Britney was a child, she had to work really hard. When she was 13 years old, she won all the beauty pageants.”

CLIP 2 shows Brit wrapped in a white bath towel, again perched on the edge of the bed. Talking to thin air, she mumbles:

“Britney has an angel looking out for her, don’t you, angel?”

CLIP 3 sees Britney talking to Adnan, who’s holding the camera, and calling him by his pet name Bubba.

She smiles: “I’m really happy. Bubba’s here for me now. It’s all good.”

Adnan is still withholding CLIP 4 and CLIP 5.

CLIP 6, filmed last week, shows Britney crying hysterically after a night out. Mascara stains her cheeks as she wails: “Britney wants to live. I’m not crazy. I miss the kids and I did love Kevin.”

Is that a Peacock?

Is that a peacock?!!!! Nope! It's Kelly Rowland performing at some gay nightclub in London.
The girl is really reaching.. the big hair... tacky stage attire...
"Mirror Mirror on the wall you're not the fairest of them all! Beyonce is!"

Thursday, January 24, 2008

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

Upon conversating about Valentines Day me and my best friend find ourselves in the same sinking boat....We ask about Valentines Day and get told "I don't celebrate Valentines Day"

So the question of the day is: Is it a culture thing or are we just the side bitches?

Where will their new homes be?

What will come of these two famed rappers, rumors are swirling of Nas being dropped from Def Jam and Lil Kim has said goodbye to her home at Atlantic.

Is there time truly up, will we be sub come to constant Soulja Boy anthems? Lord help us please!


Which media whore do you think can rock this sweatshirt best?
A.Paris Hilton
B.Lindsay Lohan
C.Britney Spears

Katie Holmes is killin em!

Katie Holmes looks more amazing as each day passes! If you can take over someone elses "Posh" style and make it work even better on you, I say go for the gold and rock it out girl!

Jamie Lynn to hand over baby

The new issue of Star magazine reveals that Jamie Lynn Spears will hand over her baby to her mother Lynne Spears upon delivery of the child. She has encouraged Jamie Lynn to have a normal teenage life that includes friends, parties and a career. How many 16yrs old do you know that have a "Career"? I know more with babies then careers. Personally I think Lynne is trying to keep Jamie Lynn as her personal cash cow since Brtiney no longer fucks with her mama.

“After several weeks of personal soul searching and talks and discussions with her mum Jamie Lynn reluctantly agreed that giving up the baby is the right thing to do. Lynne says Jamie doesn’t understand the life long consequences of having a baby. She still wants her daughter to be able to be a teenager, go to parties, hang out with friends and have a career. So she’ll take the front seat of caring for the baby and take the pressure off her daughter"

Lynne has already fucked up two children. I believe her son is doing well. But is it really smart for her to fuck up a third child?

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Quote of the day

"Lifes short, so you might as well hold his hand"

Bye Bye Roots

I was a bit late posting today because i was busy getting beautified. And no I'm not a natural blonde... it costs alot to make this color happen. Nonetheless I look fabulous! haha

More puppies for sale!!

I'm officially gonna become a mommy again if my sister continues to sell these puppies. My heart can't take it anymore!!!

This Just In!

Britney Spears will not regain any visitation of her two boys Jayden James and Sean Preston.

Lil Wayne gangsta or not?

A friend of mine who goes by the name Dj Radio ( shoutout to you!) had a funny ass away message today it read as follows:
"Lil Wayne has to be the dumbest n***a alive, going back and forth to jail does not testify you as being gangsta!"

I'm not soo concerned with the reasoning behind why he got locked up but when did that tattoo between his eyes get sooo effing big? I once found lil wayne sexy... not sooo much anymore

Heath Ledger dead at 27

News broke yesterday afternoon that actor Heath Ledger had been found dead in his Soho apartment about 2:30 in the afternoon. Discovered by his maid and masouuse, the actors sudden death left the world to believe it was caused by a drug overdose. As of today rolled-up $20 bill was found near Heath Ledger's body, though no illegal drugs were found in his apartment, police said Wednesday -- the same day an autopsy on the "Brokeback Mountain" actor came back inconclusive.

Authorities found six different types of prescription drugs in Ledger's apartment, including pills to treat insomnia and anxiety and an antihistamine, according to two law enforcement officials who spoke on condition of anonymity because the investigation is ongoing. Three of the drugs were prescribed in Europe.

The $20 bill was to be taken to a lab for testing, though no visible drug residue was found on it, police said. At a Manhattan news conference, NYPD Commissioner Ray Kelly did not elaborate on whether police think the bill, discovered on the floor near Ledger's bed, may have been used to snort drugs.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

My top 5 pet peeves at the gym

I try to spend atleast 4 days a week in the gym believe me I would love to spend more but life sometimes seems to get in the way of that. But the days that I am there I get to really observe people and their habits and learn more and more about myself and my pet peeves. Below I have listed my top 5 pet peeves at the gym.

1. If there are 4 treadmills to the left and or right of me that are free to use, why does the overweight guy who can't breathe when he walks have to come and use the one directly next to me!!! Move the fuck over! Don't you see there's 10 more that noones using! I'm sweating enough, I don't need the sweat off of your forehead landing on me.

2. Whoever thought it was a good idea to hire fat unattractive women to work the front desk must not have taken any sociology classes in college....Now this may only apply to me but when I walk into the gym I want to be greeted by someone who's in shape not some sloppy mess.

3. What's with the old men who wear booty shorts that allow their whole package to be exposed while excersing. Is this how you court women at 50 years old? I wanna see tight ab's not some shriveled up balls.

4. Girls that wear makeup to the gym. Is this or Planet Fitness?

5. The juice head who just got done sticking a needle in his ass but comes to the gym to socialize and feel like the big man on campus. (This is bcuz he no longer feels like the big man in the bedroom. Steroids shrink your penis)

Can 50 save State Property?

The streets are talking and from what they tell me, State Property is gearing up to make their comeback but this time around there's only room for Beanie, Freeway and Peedi Crack.
Recently Beanie and Freeway called into Gunit Radio (Shade 45) very displeased with the state of their rap careers and even more unhappy with the way Jigga man has been handling their projects.
Fast forward to today and talks have been arranged for 50 to buy out the rights to State Property and give them the fresh new start they so desperatley need.

Exclusive Exclusive Exclusive!!!

Just when you all thought Rocsi and Terrence were getting it in....guess again, my VERY VERY reliable source has filled me in with some very juicy gossip about 106 & Parks very own Rocsi. They tell me that Rocsi and football star Roy Williams have been exclusivley dating now for the past six months, Roy recently purchased an 08 Range Rover as a gift for Rocsi.
As soon as the football stars agent and friends got wind of this news they immediatley told him to fall the fuck back and take the truck back!
But where Roy fucked up was when he paid the whole lease upfront and encouraged Rocsi to put the truck in her name.
Williams has asked the dealership to withhold the plates for the vehicle from Rocsi as she rants and raves begging and pleading for the dealership to give up her plates.
DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA!!! I'll keep you all posted on how this story unravels.

I say Rocsi's pussy can't be that good if all it took for Roy to flip on her was a few words from his dudes....

Monday, January 21, 2008

Can anyone say Plastic Surgery

I think it's fair to say that little Miss.Aubrey got herself a boob job.

A very pregnant JLo

I was just asking on friday night.. Where the hell has JLo been? When am I gonna see some pics of her looking like a horse!
Well here she is attending her baby shower in NYC's Gramercy Park this past weekend.


I love love love Kim K! But why does everything she do always look so staged? Check her and her man Reggie Bush locking lips at 50's show the other night. If I was in the business of reading body language I would say Reggie is more interested in 50 then Kimmy.

Because it's Martin Luther King Day

Free At Last

Free at last, free at last,
Thank God Almighty, I'm free at last.

The very time I thought I was lost,
Thank God Almighty, I'm free at last;
My dungeon shook and my chains fell off,
Thank God Almighty, I'm free at last,
This is religion, I do know,
Thank God Almighty, I'm free at last;
For I never felt such a love before,
Thank God Almighty, I'm free at last.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

White Girl Tip of the Week

Dinner with the girls this week taught me this tip right here.....

When all else fails give him your ass. Enough said.
xoxo Jen The Pen

Saturday, January 19, 2008

"He keeps me FRESHER then the next bitch"

He asked me what my favorite high end brand was.. and my wish was his command
This along with a thousand other reasons are why I "Feel This Way" xoxo

Friday, January 18, 2008

Puppies for Sale

Isn't this the cutest baby ever!!!!

"It's like a forest down there!!"

I know the title of this blog has some of you thinking WTF! Cuz I know i would be saying the same thing to myself. So let me brief you on my evening last night and where such a title comes from. Like any weekday evening I did dinner with two of my girlfriends. One of those friends just happened to get married last week, and the other his back dating "The Russian". One cocktail into dinner and the sex talks begin. I mean besides catching up on what our work weeks have been like the next topic on the agenda is always SEX. And boy can I tell you we all have 3 very different sex lives... to be a fly on that wall... I tell ya!
There ended up being two questions of the night(one which will act as my White Girl Tip of the week on Sunday) but the one that had me chocking on my Cosmopolitan was the ... "How do you ask somebody to trim their balls?"
Seems like "The Russian" doesn't take a razor to that bitch very often and my dear friend ends up getting a pube caught up her nose everytime she takes a trip down south. My logical answer was "You may not want to ask him to take it all off... theres certain pheromones in the hair that get let out when you both become aroused.. the more he takes off the less horny you may get for him. (Side bar: I speak from experience, I mean by all means you never want a forest but theres just something not so sexy about a man taking it all off...and if i could compare hair down there to no hair down there....I've never gotten right off of someone who was a baldie)
So my answer to her was fuck it. Let him live why fuck up a good "fuck"

But the question still remains.... 
Being the good listener I am, I happened to over hear some juicy gossip a few days ago that Chris Breezy was smashing down Rhianna. Buttttt I didn't wanna corrupt anyones mind until I had some proof. I say the pic below is proof enough.
(She's rocking a Chris Brown Entertainment jacket) Way to support your man!!!

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Consequence presents "The Good, The Bad,The Ugly"

Birthday Kisses XoXo

Happy Birthday Ray J! If your the lucky girl that happens to get your "picture" taken with Ray J tonight, wish him a big Happy Birthday! Today the R&B singer/"Film" star turns how he has grown lol...for now check out his new single featuring Yung Berg "Sexy Can I" from his upcoming album "All I Feel"!

My 2nd "Bloggermercial"

Late night Taco run

Is it me or does Beyonce need to lay off the tacos? I mean I'm digging the new hairstyle but dosen't she look like shes packing for the winter? lol

The 1 Series

Since I was once in the buisness of car selling, I always find myself a bit interested time and time again in whats going on in the world of cars. And today I found some rather big news for BMW. The company has decided to stray a bit from it's roots to bring us a new coupe that will be less then 30K. They call it the 1series or the 135 (which happens to be a little more pricey at 35K)
They've been selling these cars in Europe since about 2004, the price of the car caught my eye but the body of it..ehh not so much from behind it reminds me a bit of the Volvo S60. The inside rather isn't as roomy as a volvo would be. Either way when this car goes on the market in NY the lease prices on it will suck anyway. Any new make or model has horrible residuals when they first arrive on the scene so all in the all the BMW 1 Series is a big bust.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Britney's suicide notes,birthday suit and pregnancy tests

Seems like Ms.Britney Spears won't give the world not even a half a second to remember that her 16yr old sister JamieLynn is pregnant. In todays findings of the young and the reckless life of Britney Spears I came across the following there anyone out there who can truly take control of this woman or might she turn into another Marilyn Monroe and Anna Nicole Smith tragedy. I'm praying for you Britney. I'm too the point that I'm absolutley appauled... I mean getting strapped down to a stretcher as the entire world watched was BADDDD!!! But now cold sores all over your face? Now thats what I call hitting rock bottom!

Less than a month into her relationship with new boyfriend Adnan Ghalib, troubled singer Britney Spears has been videotaped apparently shopping for pregnancy test kits.

Several US websites have published the images of Britney and Adnan shopping at a Los Angeles branch of drugstore chain Rite Aid.

Once picture appears to show Britney browsing the pregancy test section of the store.

This follows revelations by a celebrity gossip magazine that she is planning to have more children, having lost custody of her sons, Sean Preston and Jayden James, to their father, Kevin Federline.

It is also claimed Britney is to convert to Islam for Adnan's sake.

This follows reports she wrote a suicide note before being rushed to a psychiatric ward earlier this month.

The note, found in her bathroom by a friend, revealed the depth of the singer's despair and her fears that she will not live up to other people's expectations.

Britney has reportedly been suffering from mental health problems for years, including manic depression and multiple personality disorders and doctors and friends believe she needs urgent help.

The source told The Sun: "The letter was very sad. Britney talked about her loneliness, how unfair life is and not being able to trust people.

"She wrote about how she will never be what people want her to be.

"She said 'Perhaps it would be better if I was dead."

No stranger to crazy behaviour, Britney Spears' shocking antics continued on a recent trip to an LA clothing store, where Britney emerged from the fitting room - stark naked.

Accompanied by her photographer boyfriend Adnan Ghalib, the star disappeared into the dressing room with him, spending nearly an hour making "strange" noises.

The 26-year-old mother of two shocked the saleswoman in the shop, who made an attempt to cover her up, but was faced with a litany of abuse.

The shop assistant told Life & Style: "I was blown away. Britney's private parts were right in front of me!"

"I grabbed a dress to cover her and she screamed, 'Get away from me! Don't you f***ing come near me!'" says the employee.

"Then she disappeared in the dressing room with Adnan for 45 minutes. They were making weird noises. It was disgusting."

When Britney and Adnan finally emerged, Spears mumbled something unintelligible.

"I couldn't understand a word she was saying. She was slurring and spitting, and talking with a British accent," says the employee.

"Her face was covered with cold sores and acne, and her scalp was patchy. I wanted to help her, but she was so mean that I left her alone. Then she muttered, 'F**k you!' and left the store."

Scroll down for more...

Prayer: After a fleeting appearance at the courthouse, Britney fled to Hollywood's Little Brown Church. The court later ruled that Britney had lost her visitation rights to see her sons indefinitely

Britney recently lost the right to see her sons because she was too busy waiting for a home furniture delivery.

The singer arrived at her custody case nearly four hours late - but even then didn't enter the courtroom.

At the last minute, the star decided not to attend the hearing, and drove off to a church, saying: "I'm scared. I want to get back into the car."

She has since confided to friends that she was late for the court appearance because she was waiting for furntiure to be delivered to her Malibu home.

Wearing a white, wedding-style lace dress, Britney, who was accompanied by Adnan, climbed back into a black jeep.

She was then driven by a posse of bodyguards to a brown clapboard church, where she stayed for about five minutes before leaving again, trailed all the time by a convoy of paparazzi.

Video: Britney stops off at chapel with boyfriend Adnan Ghalib

During her brief visit to the chapel, Britany left a personal note in a prayer box known as a "God can".

This is what we call the "Bloggermercial"

My 24th Birthday!

I was searching my name on youtube and to my suprise found the footage from my 24th birthday soiree! I looked soooo pretty if i can say so myself!

Harlow Wynter Madden

Ok, so sue me but I just had to steal this ohhhhh soooooo adorable picture of Nicole Richies new bundle of joy from Mediatakeout. Nicole Richie gave birth this past friday same day as Christina Aguliera who popped out a bouncing baby boy.
Usually babies aren't so cute right out of the womb but I just wanna bite her little cheeks off. She looks alot like her mommy,

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

All Work No Play

This is what Pleasure and I look like at 7:40am. We've been working since 6pm yesterday.

Monday, January 14, 2008


Take a good hard look at the new Gucci Hysteria bag I promise you all I will have it by Spring!
Donations are welcome =0)

Visit for a better view!

5 things I learned in Miami

Being that this is my last and final night in the Mia, I thought I would school you all on a few things that i've learned from being surrounded by nothing but men and groupies.

Starting in at #5. Groupies will always be present in any recording session, theres no going around this..rather then giving them the stink face, befriend the bitches they may be able to inspire a blog posting (like this one) or teach you some tricks of the trade on sucking a mean you know what.
#4. While sitting in on a session keep your ears WIDEEEEE open the shit these artists be talking about is priceless
(i.e. my blog labeled PeeYouuu)
#3. Sandals in Miami in the month of January is OK ( i had issues when packing and felt funny about bringing open toes in january.. it must be that NY winter fashion in me)
#2. Going off your diet and following what the boys are eating NOT a good idea! (Now i gotta run extra hard on that treadmill come Wednesday)
And the #1 thing I learned in Miami is......
#1. All men are HOES!

I got a bonus tip for you... Ladies please don't think when he (the artist,producer,songwriter) invites you to his session you are NOT special nor are you the only one, he's already invited a different bitch the nights before.. it's like clockwork, he's got the a different one for a different day and different hours. They practically check in at a time clock. (The time clock being his assistant)

My stunt man

LMFAO check out my very own personal stunt dummy. This is his best "Jen the Pen" impression!

Sunday, January 13, 2008


Whats that smell? Whispers have it that Miss.Solange Knowles can't rid herself of a musty smell. Guess all those expensive body washes aren't working well in her favor. Girl, go get you some Dove soap and call it a day.